Shielding From Church Players
The church is a literal playground of women who may be looking for “a good man” while the wolf in sheep’s clothing is lurking for the opportunity to manipulate and take advantage of their vulnerability. His intentions may not be known at the onset but he’s there with an assortment of charms and verses.
So what’s the solution? How can sisters protect themselves from church players without becoming so defensive that they shut all men out of their lives?
Here are four areas to consider:
1. We need to hold our church leaders accountable. The “boys will be boys” way of thinking needs to go, from the pews to the pulpit! Let’s expect our men to honor God, honor women and honor themselves. And let’s heal whatever it is that’s broken in these church players so that they can stop preying on others.
2. We need to rethink the ways we talk about sexuality in the church. Shaming women and holding them responsible for men’s bad behavior isn’t working, especially when you think about the centuries of abuse and trauma Black women have suffered at the hands of men they’ve loved.
God created sex and he created marriage, but if we continue with the “touch not, handle not” approach to teaching about sexuality, we’ll lose our sisters.
