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The 58th GRAMMY Awards - Arrivals

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Ciara and Russell Wilson’s love story is something out of a 16-year-old teen girl’s diary. They’re like that couple in high school who held hands while eating lunch, walked to school together and conveniently took bathroom breaks at the same time so they could steal PG kisses in the staircase. Somehow, we’re being trolled by that same couple, only this time we’re all adults and they should know better.

Ciara and Dangeruss Wilson have made it abundantly clear, they are head over heels in angelic love with each other, like the stuff you see on “7th Heaven,” minus the steamy sex that comes along with the honeymoon phase of any relationship. I’ve come to two conclusions: they’re either lying through their veneers about being abstinent or they’ve managed to out corny themselves.

Almost 10 months into their relationship and they haven’t consummated their celebrity union. Boo. What if his penis is too small? (miss me with that size doesn’t matter crap, we don’t need 10″ but this ride is 6″ and above). What if he’s one of those guys who whisper in your ear, “Am I hurting you?”

Oh God the horror. What if he has gets diaper rash during intense football practice and breaks out in hives around his man member? I’m being dramatic, but what if he sucks and Ciara already invested a year with this guy who can’t even find the right hole.

Not to mention, sex and intimacy brings you and your partner closer. To think Ciara and Russell have yet to experience that passion concerns me.

By now, you’re either riding out with me on this one, or you’re questioning if I’m a spawn in the flesh (I enjoy the dialogue so feel free to leave your comments below).

Before Ciara and Russell became an item, Ci Ci suffered a rough breakup with her baby’s father Future (who you may know as the patron saint of Trap n*ggas). One minute she was in a wedding dress on the cover of Bride magazine; the next thing we know, she was slamming him and some chick with a fake ass and Brazilian hair –presumably one of Future’s thots, but who can be sure?

As a woman, I wholeheartedly understand going through a bad breakup and questioning everything I ever understood about the relationship world. I empathize with Ci Ci because I have a feeling she just knew Future was going to treat her different. Been there girl.

Russell, on the other hand, is the kind of guy rebounds are made of. Sweet, romantic, a gentleman who wouldn’t grab ass in the strip club. We love him for that. Russell is doing his job, playing batman to her cat woman, minus the fact Ciara’s goodies are off-limits, which seems like she’s making Russell pay for Future’s mistakes.

Ciara told PEOPLE,

“He’s an awesome guy and a very confident guy. Just like I feel like I’m a woman that knows what I want, he’s a man who knows what he wants.”
Uhm…like sex?

Ci Ci and Russell have yet to convince me not having sex is actually beneficial. They can do all the fun things they’ve been doing — $100,000 Mexican vacations, superhero themed birthday parties and more vacations — while sexually enjoying one another. I understand being single and celibate, but I can’t comprehend the benefit of being celibate in a relationship.

I’ve been in a relationship long enough to know sex isn’t everything, but it’s certainly important.

Furthermore, even if these two decided that being abstinent is for them, which every couple certainly has the right to do, stop shoving it down all of our throats, as if somehow you’re on a holy mission and you’re elevated to saint status. It’s inherently sending a message that sex is bad or dirty or wrong, when it is a beautiful thing to share between consenting adults.

Abstinence is a choice, just like wearing red socks or giving up soda. It doesn’t make you a good person, it doesn’t help you make better life choices and it doesn’t need to be broadcast to the world at every chance you get. In their inherent quest to prove how damn pious they are, they’re replacing their supposed carnal sin with another equally dangerous one: pride.

Next time, let’s hope these two decide to abstain from putting their business out to the world.

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Ciara: Russell Wilson Is ‘The Most Beautiful Thing I’ve Ever Seen’

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Unpopular Opinion: I’m Not Buying This Abstinent Ish, Ciara & Russell Wilson Should Just Have Sex  was originally published on hellobeautiful.com