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A KKK group in Atlanta applied to adopt a highway on the one-mile stretch of Route 515 in the Appalachian Mountains. They claim they want the adopt the highway to clean and maintain it. However, something didn’t sit right with the powers that be in the Georgia Department of Transportation, so they’re debating on whether or not to grant the International Keystone Knights chapter of the KKK their highway.

Since the KKK is so adamant about adopting something and they might not get a highway, here’s five other things they could adopt:

1. Adopt A New Uniform

Ok, so those conehead sheets with the holes cut out for the eyes are a little bit–how can I put this nicely–costumey. Maybe if they had an outfit that was a little more professional and less like a do-it-yourself ghost costume, then maybe they’d be taken more seriously.

2. Adopt Less Racist Practices

We get it. They’re against everyone that isn’t them. Their practices haven’t gotten them far since they starting terrorizing people of color in 1865. That’s a long time to be around with no real impact–other than during the Civil Rights movement, but even then…we overcame, right?

3. Adopt Better Titles

If you’ve ever checked out a KKK website, you’d see their hierarchy has a hilarious way of addressing themselves. With titles like Grand Cyclops, Grand Maji, Grand Monk, Grand Exchequer, Grand Turk, Imperial Wizard, Grand Alabama Dragon…and the list goes on. What ever happened to President, Vice President, Secretary?

4. Adopt A Better Webmaster

Have you seen the website for the International Keystone Knights? One word comes to mind–ratchetttttt! They shouldn’t be looking for highways to adopt, they should be checking for someone with more website building skills than who they have.

5. Adopt A More Meaningful Name

“Ku Klux” derived from the Greek word, “Kuklos,” which means circle with no beginning or end and “Klan” is from the Scottish word “Clan” which refers to family. So–a endless circle of family with no real beginning. How creative and…pointless.

What do you think the KKK should adopt? Let’s discuss on Twitter @Rhapsodani.

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5 Things The KKK Should Adopt (Other Than A Highway)  was originally published on