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Beloved, if you watch “Iyanla: Fix My Life” on OWN you undoubtedly remember Jay Williams, the Atlanta video producer who appeared on the season 4 premiere to reveal he has 34 children with 17 different women, ranging age 26 to three (I still can’t!). During the explosive segment, he was confronted by some of the mothers, did a weird exercise with dolls and asked for forgiveness from some of the children and had the gall to tell them “This has been one of the most painful experiences I’ve ever had in my life,” (bruh).

Well Williams’ oldest child, Amina Mosley, has since written an open letter titled “Dear Iyanla, Thank You for ‘Fixing’ My Father,” and she has some issues to address with the TV host. In the very lengthy letter Moseley tells the TV host: “You have done a remarkable job of making him feel better about himself,” adding, “He has received the validation that he always hoped for. He now gets to be the poster child, the voice of all of the ‘rolling stones’ across the country.”

Wait, what?

Mosely notes that even though her family has now appeared on multiple episodes, with another followup to air this weekend, very little has changed between the man who helped her come into existence and her siblings.  “The even bigger reality is that last night was the first time that I spoke with my father since the show aired,” she wrote in the letter, dated October 9. “So far the show has been running for 5 episodes with another follow-up episode set to air this upcoming weekend. That means that it took almost half of your season for me to actually have a conversation with my father and that conversation only took place because I called him.”

Also disturbing, she details asking her father how he’s doing with some of the backlash he’s received since the show and she said he told her “he is very blessed with all of the opportunities that he has ahead of him because of the show.”  Oh really?

Of course if any of these “opportunities” are financial, Mosely and her siblings haven’t seen the benefits. She continues in her letter: “He stated ‘The production made me appear to be like those regular guys out there who just have babies everywhere and don’t do anything for them.’ I actually think that he forgot who he was speaking with  because in my eyes he has always been just a ‘regular’ guy having babies and not taking any true responsibility for them. In response to his denial filled statement I calmly said, ‘let’s be honest, if you were solely responsible for my three meals a day since birth I would not be breathing right now.’”

Meanwhile, another one of Williams’ children, Chantelle Williams echos her sisters statements that little has changed in the family….outside of their “dad’s” social status. Chantelle started a GoFundMePage for support for her family after she says they were “used and exploited” by the show that “has done nothing positive for us and/or our relationship with our father.” On the crowdfunding page, which has currently raised $120, she says:

The show has made our father a household name, garnered Iyanla her highest ratings ever and greatly benefitted OWN but what about us?  There have been “update” shows etc. and our father seems to be Iyanla’s new side kick in discussing this topic, but what about us?  All too often the attention in placed and focused on the adults when the children regardless of the ages are the real victims here.  We didn’t ask to be here, we didn’t participate willingly like our father and all the women, we are the innocent and now with all of the media attention and hoopla it seems that we are left behind to try to “fix our lives” pun intended.

“What about the children?” both sisters ask, while Mosely repeatedly adds: “Who holds my Father and the men that are like him accountable?” (She offers an answer to the latter question: “I’d have to say the millions of viewers). As if the man’s actions and excuses weren’t already deplorable on the show, it’s disturbing to think that he’s going to profit off of the harm he’s done to this family and continues to inflict on them.

But while her sister may still be reeling, Mosely isn’t bitter.

“Here’s what I learned from this process; It was never about highlighting the extraordinary circumstances of my family, it was about healing and finding your inner peace,” she notes.  “This has tested my ability to compartmentalized the feelings that I have toward my father, so that I don’t allow his mistakes to mold my decisions.  I also have to be cautious as not to project my feelings onto others. I am not just the eldest of 34. Who I am and what I feel as an individual does matter.  His absence in my life is not a detriment.  In fact, it has actually made me stronger, and serves a greater purpose.”

 

What’s your take on “Iyanla: Fix My Life?” Do you think it really has the potential to help people change, or is it just for show? 

Nothing Was Fixed: Daughter Of Man With 34 Kids Writes Open Letter Calling Out Iyanla Vanzant  was originally published on hellobeautiful.com